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Stephen Brivati 강사 칼럼

What was an unusual experience with a random person?

2021년 8월 23일

These days it’s getting harder and harder to have unusual experiences with random people. Of course,  covid-19 has played a large part in this since lockdowns and restrictions have reduced social interaction.  However, I think this is only the tip of the iceberg.

I believe genuine social interaction began to disappear when social media became one of the predominant factors in peoples’ lives. Many people say this is not true. They argue that we meet a lot more people online than we would have otherwise come into contact with.  I don’t dispute that, but I don’t think this is normal communication between humans who are genuinely interested in each other. What I mean by this is that when using things like Twitter and Facebook people don’t actually listen and try to see the other person’s point of view very much. In face to face communication we really do have to pay attention to what the other person is saying, how they are saying it and what message they may be trying to get across. This can be call ed empathetic listening. It does not really occur much online. As a result, people are becoming progressively more lonely and lacking in basic communication skills. To mitigate this problem I would recommend making a point of trying to strike up conversations with strangers everyday. Of course, you may be politely (or rudely) rebuffed but most of the time people actually like talking and the results can be amazing.

Having got that off my chest, I would have to say that I cannot really bring to mind any really ‘unusual’ random experiences with one great exception. Three years ago an old friend sent me a photo of a Japanese women in a kimono who was looking for a partner and wondered if we might try a date. I was not that interested in the photo and rather busy so I didn’t bother following up on the offer. Six months later I bumped into her by a coffee machine in a karaoke box and instantly fell in love with her. We have been happily married for over two years!

On a different note, working in junior high schools gives me daily opportunities to find out about the lives and interests of my students. I have found, for example, a kid who seems dull in class who actually plays the cello for many hours a day and is well on the way to music college. Or there is the 13 year old who wants to study ballet in France. On top of her arduous training she is also studying French in her own time.  Fascinating kids who inspire me to work harder and get more from my life.

That’s it for this week.  Stay safe and well.

Buri

 

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